For those that haven’t heard of her, Constance Hall is a Perth based blogger, writer, fashion designer, and social media personality who crashed through our screens and into the public sphere with her very real and honest take on sex as parents. That post was everything for two reasons: Firstly, it made me laugh like a freight train passing through a tin shed. Secondly it gave me huge sense of relief. It wasn’t just me, it was also me, her, and an endless list of other women in the comments sections all writing “Omg! SAME!”. I felt so validated.
These days there are a lot of bloggers writing about the ins and outs of parenting. I appreciate all of them because different writers appeal to different audiences and god knows parents need someone to relate to. I’m way past the age of wanting to stand out and be different, I just want reassurance that I’m not losing it totally and that’s what Constance gives me. We all need someone we can see ourselves in. She’s a bit of a frazzled, brutally honest hippy with a potty mouth, no filter and a fear of flying – I am a bit of a frazzled, brutally honest hippy with a potty mouth, no filter and a fear of flying. You see where I’m going with this? Constance speaks to my core.
However the reasons many people love her is also the reason many people dislike, troll her online, and even send graphic death threats. Coming into 2019 a lot of people are still super uncomfortable with the idea of a very outspoken and sexually liberated woman. She has been criticized for all aspects of her life, including her relationships, her children, her body and her sex life. Her raw honesty is a magnet for those who get their jollies belittling and bullying people they don’t know and as she found out, hoooooo boy, there are a lot of them. You’d think in this digital age people would have learnt to scroll past people they don’t like, but apparently not.
However even with all this controversy Constance has managed to get ahead, writing two books and designing a clothing range, Queen the Label (as a nod to the fact she refers to her followers as queens) Of the label, her biggest sellers are a collection of skirts with a chunky elastic waist band she developed to accommodate a woman’s ever changing middle section. Periods, pregnancy, water retention, IBS, roast dinners and pasta have all contributed at some point to my tummy fluctuating wildly between a size 8 and a size 12. Although if I’m going to be super honest, my youngest is 10 years old, so it’s mostly Toffee Pop related rather than anything to do with pregnancies. The point of the skirt is to provide comfort and a smooth silhouette (that’s fancy talk for sucks in the rolls) to those of us with a bit of jiggle in our wiggle irrespective of size.
As I was lucky enough to get hold of a skirt in the print and size I wanted so I’m going to go through each aspect of the skirt to figure out if the Mum Tum lives up to the hype. I’m a 37 year old mum of two with a tragic carb addiction. My tummy is certainly not what it was 15 years ago, or even 5 years ago and I’m about to put a crop top on and take photos of myself. Please send thoughts and prayers to me at this scary time.
Ordering and Shipping – The website was quick and easy to use and the shipping was about a week which is fairly standard. I was also emailed with my parcel’s progress. Skirt arrived well packaged. So far so good
The Skirt – Fabric was wonderful, really soft and made with a high quality cotton. Definitely suitable for winter and summer so you’re definitely getting your moneys-worth on wear time. The elastic at the top is pretty thick so it should have no worries safely gathering everything in. I was pretty excited to find pockets as we were shooting, good ones too, not pissy little token efforts you usually get with a lot of women’s clothing.
A note about sizing. Go a size down. My general size is a 10 so I ordered an 8 and it fits really well. I could have also gone for a 6 for a more corset-like fit. Measure your waist and go by your measurement, not your dress size.
The Wear Test – I had to do a bit of adjusting to get the waistband just right, but when I did it stayed put and didn’t ride up or slip down which was great. It’s got quite a bit of material in it so there was no clinging to areas I’d rather stuff not cling to. Something to note is the length. I’m 5ft 4 tall (162cm) and it just hit the bottom of my ankles. If you’re a taller sister it’s probably going to be around the tops of your ankles or above. The skirt is extremely comfortable to wear and move around in. It’s flare means you’re not going to trip over the hem and rip it (may or may not be speaking from bitter experience on that one). However my favourite thing about my skirt is when i sit down – NO ROLLS! I can also put on a fitted shirt with it and no muffin top sitting on my side like a little jelly speed bump.
In conclusion – I actually love this skirt. For NZ$62.50 – not my cheapest or most expensive purchase – It was well worth the price point for something that I plan to wear all the time.
Order yours here. There is limited availability so make sure you keep your eyes on her website for your chosen print.